The Boy Inside

The yearning to connect
All I ever wanted is
Acknowledgment and acceptance
I can barely contain it
These thoughts of mine
 
What you’ll find is
A scared boy inside
Afraid to step out into the world
His mind and experiences enslave him
Shackles him to one spot
A place deep inside
Where no one will see
 
Till one day, he turns a man
And breaks the chains
Freedom he sees
It is in his grasp
But yet he is never free
For the Shadow of the past
Blocks the light
So that he is forever
One step behind.

P.S. I am trying to self-host, I hope it's not an inconvenience.

Our Nature

Men are all equal
What a childish ideal
The eternal sin man has committed
Onto himself, across all generations
The reverberating effects
Of the injustice suffered

Evident all around
No matter the era
No matter the region
This inescapable rule
The undeniable truth
That still persists
We are not equal
Once separated by race
Then by Opulence
Now by intellect

We strive to achieve
Attain what is not ours
For throughput is low
And reserved for the few
But desire propels us
Towards a life of green

It is natural
And now our nature
A nature that has brought forth
Primitive and vicious minds
Constantly conflating
Survival with prosperity
Undermining humanity, and
Degrading ourselves.

Passage of Life

Time is in such abundance that it never ends
Yet it feels like there is so little
In the past, the future looked so distant
So far away that everything seemed blurry
The closer you approach
The more the seemingly amorphous objects gain shape
As a child, you approached at a sauntering pace
But with the shove from a phantom hand
That slow pace soon turns into a maddening dash

What once was well out of sight
Now is right in front of you
With a glance behind
You realize how far you’ve travelled
So that what once had meaning
Now is distant and detached

You stand in the present
The open space once occupied
Has shrunken, gradually
But in youth, you do not notice
Until suddenly, one day, you realize
How narrow the path has become

You’ve reached the limits of the land behind
But a large ocean is in front
Separating you from the vast landmass on the other side
You must cross
But the infinite has become finite

Now the gravity of the situation sinks in
You are no longer a child
For children run freely in the open plain
Going wherever the mood takes
But adults must traverse the isthmus
With heavy waves crashing from all directions
The phantom hand now pushes you to your knees
So that you crawl…
You must crawl….
For the ocean is unforgiving
Lose your footing and you will surely drown.

Maddening Descent

 Losing the will to go on
What emptiness inside
I see others basking in glee
But I can't figure out why
 
Am I so broken inside?
That I am either not able to see
What life truly has to offer
Or do I just inherently reject this offer
 
Life, this universal movie
I just never seem to get
Maybe I have the wrong ticket
Or is this just the preview
 
Completion is something I never feel
This hollowing, yearning for something more
I don't see the point in continuing
Yet tomorrow life courses through my veins
 
There is will and passion,
But only for a half day
The next is stoic
Is this not madness?
 
Vacillating between joy and despair
Uncertain of which memories are true
One instance filled with vibrantly dancing colours
The next a slab of dull stationary ones
 
Not sure if these dreams are worth attaining
For this emptiness consumes all
It is a deep insatiable feeling
One that never leaves
It only masks itself and gradually eats away
Eroding your mind and sanity.